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The Bride decided enough was enough and she wanted to lose ten pounds. So I went on a diet.

Well that’s not entirely true, but I simply won’t do diets. I don’t believe in them. I know them to be counter to healthy weight loss, something I know a little about having lost 100 pounds a few years back and kept (most) it off. But since I cook around here and since The Bride’s obsession with the scale grated my nerves more than the promos for “Two Broke Girls” I decided to go along with a more intensive eating plan focused on weight loss.

In effect I decided to ramp up our nutrition game, which is why you haven’t seen any decadent chocolate post from the Test Kitchen as of late (I know, I miss them too). Part of keeping my weight off is calibrating now and again when the scale starts to creep up. It hasn’t been creeping since Christmas, but hasn’t been sliding either. Thus, I’m game with The Bride on this one (not that I had a choice).

As I’ve said before there is only one thing you can do to lose weight: eat right and exercise. (Well, that’s two things, but you have to do both, so it’s like two things that are one thing like Iced tea because you can’t have one, uh…never mind). But the variable is how “right” do you want to eat. We are simply eating “righter” these days.

By that we’ve made two adjustments: We cut out virtually all deserts (which hurts me nearly as much as cutting out alcohol, because to be honest, I’m really done with denying myself after giving that one up) and we are absolutely loading up on veggies.

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We creeped toward these changes for the better part of the month but when The Bride made her pronouncement two weeks ago, we went in whole hog (minus the hog).  I basically started loading a wide spectrum of vegetables and some fruits into everything we ate. Lunch became a cut up apple with Effin Artist Peanut Butter, surrounding by raw vegetables and Effin Artist Humus. Breakfast became oatmeal with protein powder and apples or bananas or cranberries one day, and an omelet stuffed to the gills with slightly seared vegetables. Dinner became a massive vegetable main dish, with a small helping of whatever use to be the main.

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As I’ve sought to learn more about vegetables and their restorative powers through various articles and documentaries (expect a Wheat and Chaff article very soon) I caught on to a simple, brilliant thought. We need so many vegetables in our diet and they are so good for us, that most of what we do to make them tasty is comparatively better than when we don’t eat enough. So vegetable loaded burritos (on homemade wheat tortillas) can still have sour cream and a bit of meat, because it’s loaded with veggies and home cooked black beans.

Eating vegetables in large quantities make you healthier and give you more freedom.

Next, I borrowed my father-in-law’s juicer and made some zany vegetable drinks.

These are just power-packed with nutrients and can be easily swirled into smoothies with plain yogurt and a frozen banana. You’d think beet, kale and carrot juice would not go well with bananas and chocolate protein powder, but you’d be (mostly) wrong.

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The exercise part is already going well, but having agreed to a half-marathon trail run with my triathlete brother this fall, I have amped up the training ever so slightly.

So eating righter and exercising is just pulling the weight off our bodies right?

Nope. I haven’t lost anything. The Bride did lose three pounds.

SO….

So nothing. It’s perfect. Rapid weight loss means rapid weight gain later. We both feel  great and The Bride’s tone is already better. Her energy is much better, her attitude sparkly. I am losing the cravings for chocolate. Most importantly, the food is delicious. Your taste buds don’t even know what’s good if you spend too much time in the terrible whites (sugar, flour, rice and potatoes). Just like the Earth, which is an unending celebration of diversity, our diets need to be the same. When they are we simply feel better.

Those ten pounds? They’ll come off. In time. We’re not worried about it (mostly). The gains are already very, very apparent.

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