Tag Archives: stories

It only took a year, but our first T-shirt is here!

The picture you see above is not, I repeat not, the Effin Artist boardroom. If we have a boardroom like that, we wouldn’t need to sell T-shirts.
But it’s nice to dream right? Dreaming is basically what set this whole “I’m an Effin Artist, man” thing in motion–for better or worse.
Dreaming is basically all we’ve done from the start.
We used to a write an Effin Artist email. It went out to our family. We’re Italian, so it’s a pretty big list. And the other benefit was, we’re family, so they got the damn email whether they wanted it or not.
For a while, it was pretty lively. Then, my schtick wore off a bit (right about the time I stopped offering prizes for responding to the email… hmmmn). So in search of a better audience, we launched Effin Artist and the email stopped.
I kept waiting for that moment when the email readers would reach for the leg that had been amputated and realize it’s gone.
And then I got tired of waiting. So I went ahead and sent a newsletter offering a “future” prize of a free T-shirt! It went something like this:
I’m back. EFF you all if you don’t like it. Go to the bottom, find the unsubscribe button, click it and the demons of cyberville will unleash digital hell upon you because that’s what you’ll deserve. MERRY CHRISTMAS!
Yeah, it was a Christmas email. Cheery, huh? Now maybe you understand why the email “subscribers” were less than enthusiastic participants.
Anyway, the point of all that brings me to this: Those T-shirts I promised last Christmas, are FINALLY here! Right here, to be exact.
Who needs a boardroom?! We got T-shirts!
T-shirts make incredible Christmas gifts. Trust me on this. It is not too early to shop. I’m experienced in Christmas failures.
Buying “stuff” isn’t really my thing. Yet, I do like stuff as much as the next heathen. Stuff is like that. Sneaky, lusty and all that. But still, I’ve never been great at the whole make-a-Christmas list and fill it with a lot of stuff, wrapping said stuff, mailing said stuff and all that stuff. I’m a stuff failure.
The last few years I’ve tried to make stuff for Xmas. Some have gone over better than others, I guess (you’d have to ask the email list subscribers). Most arrive late though. So my made “stuff” is really more like a “hey, it’s a new year and it’s cold and it’s not all bad,” kind of gift.
Last year I tried to remedy that by promising Effin Artist T-shirts, something I make, but something someone else would deliver! It was foolproof, except, one snafu, which I wrote about back then:
These T-shirts are going to rock. Our only problem is our logo because, well … it doesn’t rock. In fact, it’s pretty much crap. Nothing worse that getting stuff that looks like crap that you have to wear on top of that. Even I’m not that cruel.
But thankfully, after four designers, we fixed the crap logo. Now it’s a great logo (made by the wonderful Ilaamen Pelshaw), which means we also have the long-awaited T-shirts (For real, right here. You can get one. To be clear, they aren’t Christmas gifts I’m giving you. I think they should be Christmas gifts you give others. Just want to be really clear on that point!)
And they make great Christmas presents because these are more than the first edition Effin Artist, “unFuck The World” T-shirts. The funds raised by the sale will go to the production costs of the Effin Artist authors and a feature film that we are working on right this very minute to get launched in 2017. After all this time basically mucking around and cheering Effin Artists everywhere, we’ve finally decided to get serious and do sh*t that matters. For us, that Sh*t is elevating great artists and stories that inspire change.
So buy a whole sh*tload of T-shirts to help these great stories get told.
Tis the season, right?!
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